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Ep 14 | SPECIAL: Wisdom from a Grad Part 4, Faith, Philology, and Freshman Year with Grace Whitaker

We sit down with TCS alumna, Grace Whitaker. Grace graduated from Trinity in 2021 and finished her first year at the University of Virginia this spring. In this light-hearted yet insightful episode, Grace shares with us some wisdom about transitioning from high school to college and remaining faithful as a Christian in a secular environment.

...one of the most powerful tools at my dispense was relationships and interacting with people and showing them the kind of love that I have found in Christ, in the hopes that if not now, but one day they would be more open to a relationship with he who first loved us.

     

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...I had this moment where I realized this is our God that we get to learn about...this is the God of the universe. There could never be anything more important to study. I just felt so overwhelmed with gratitude at the blessing that was this class and this experience, because not everybody gets that. There is nothing more worthy of our time. 

Transcript

 

Disclaimer: This is a direct transcript of the podcast audio and may not be grammatically correct.

 

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Jo Wilbur:  

Hello, and welcome to "Mind and Heart," a podcast by Trinity Christian School. I'm your host, Jo Wilbur, and today I'm sitting down with TCS alumna, Grace Whitaker. Grace graduated from Trinity in 2021and finished her first year at the University of Virginia this spring. Today, she's going to share with us some wisdom about transitioning from high school to college and remaining faithful as a Christian in a secular environment. Grace, thank you so much for joining us today.  

Grace Whitaker:  

Thank you for having me. 

Jo Wilbur:  

Of course. So, as we just said, you just finished, your first year at the University of Virginia and you are getting ready to go back here very soon. So, if you could sort of summarize for us in a nutshell, how was your first year at college? 

Grace Whitaker:  

It was wonderful. Honestly, I love school. I've always loved school. I'm weird like that. Um, and just getting to take cool classes with professors and meeting all sorts of students who were interested in similar things to me… the independence was a plus. The dining hall's not so good at UVA. Um, but other than that, it was a great time. 

I loved the new experiences. I loved the freedom. It was a lot of fun.  

Jo Wilbur:  

Can you tell us a little bit about what you're studying? 

Grace Whitaker:  

So, I'm actually planning on double majoring and minoring. 

Jo Wilbur:  

Okay, the Whitaker way. Here we go. (laughs) 

Grace Whitaker:  

Yeah. Well, I tried to double minor, but the university wouldn't let me. So, I'm majoring in English and Spanish with a concentration in linguistics and philology.  

Jo Wilbur: 

Philology? 

Grace Whitaker:  

Philology. It's basically linguistics, but for the written word. And then I'm minoring in Slavic languages and literatures for the concentration in Russian. Oh my gosh.  

Jo Wilbur:  

Oh my gosh. That sounds like quite a full plate academically. So, do you have plans for like what you want to go into when you graduate? Is there a plan here with what you want to do?  

Grace Whitaker:  

My goal is right after undergrad to apply to a PhD program in English, um, and get my doctorate. And then after that, I'd love to come back as a teacher, either at the collegiate level or at a high school. 

Jo Wilbur:  

Mm, very cool. And what made you interested in that teaching and also the subject matter, English, philology…?  

Grace Whitaker:  

I was always interested in English, not just literature, but specifically the structure of language, which is where I get into the linguistics and philology. 

Um, I, in ninth grade, actually, I took arts and aesthetics with Mr. McGarry. And in that class, we talked a lot about the philosophy of education. We talked Plato and Aristotle and learned about what it means to get educated and what it means to educate. Um, and from that class was when I decided I wanted to pursue my PhD and to become a teacher. So that kind of put my whole life plan in motion.  

Jo Wilbur:  

Wow. And what year was that at Trinity?  

Grace Whitaker:  

That was my freshman year. 

Jo Wilbur:  

So, your freshman year, so that's pretty early to like figure out your life path and what you're passionate about and what you want to do. 

Grace Whitaker:  

Yeah, well, I always knew I loved English. Even from elementary school, English was always my favorite subject. 

I don't think there was ever a time in my life when I wasn't planning on studying English at the university. Um, but as I grew up at Trinity and had new experiences, the rest of it sort of fell into place.  

Jo Wilbur:  

Was there anything about your experience that surprised you going into college? 

Grace Whitaker:  

The one thing that I definitely did not see coming is that I am so terrible with faces. I never realized it at Trinity because I've been in the same class for 12 years, and we have new students every year, but it's only a few at a time. 

And so largely my circles are the same, but when I came to college for the first time, it was 16,000 new faces all at once. And my roommate who came from a large public school, she's convinced I'm face blind.  

At the end of my second semester, a young man came over to me and I was working on homework. He said, “Hey, are you doing Russian?” And I was like, “Oh my gosh, that's so funny. I'm not right now, but I'm actually in a Russian class!” And he squinted at me and he said, “Grace, I have been in your Russian class for the past two semesters.” I just, I had no idea that, but I'm so terrible at learning new faces. And I guess I hadn't had to do it in 12 years, so it never occurred to me, but it is, it is a skill that I lack.  

Jo Wilbur:  

Oh man, yeah your pond just got a whole lot bigger, a lot more fish swimming around, a lot more people. 

Grace Whitaker:  

I need like flashcards or something. I just was not prepared for that.  

Jo Wilbur:  

Yeah, that is so funny. I had an opposite experience one time where there was this guy who had been in my class all semester and one night I was out with friends, and I went up to him to say hi. And he was like, “Who are you?” And I was like, “We've been in class together for a year,” or whatever. And um, all my friends laughed at me. It was really embarrassing.  

Grace Whitaker:  

I feel for him. I've been there, man.  

Jo Wilbur:  

Was there anything that surprised you about just living on your own for the first time? Laundry…? 

Grace Whitaker:  

I don't know what it was, but the dryers melted my clothes. So, we stopped using the dryers.  

Jo Wilbur:  

So, what do you do? Just air dry?  

Grace Whitaker:  

Yeah, we had to buy, we had to buy a drying rack and put it in our dorm.  

Jo Wilbur:  

Wow. That’s very old-timey. 

Grace Whitaker:  

Because the first time I used the dryers, like all of my clothes came out in one lump and there was like, I didn't think there was plastic in my clothes, but it felt like, like melted and re-hardened plastic. 

It was the most bizarre experience in my life. 

Jo Wilbur:  

It like melted the synthetic fibers or something? 

Grace Whitaker:  

I, I guess… 

Jo Wilbur:  

That's crazy  

Grace Whitaker:  

Melted it right on down. 

Jo Wilbur:  

(Laughs) Meted it right on down. I have never heard of such a thing. I'm trying to think like, yeah are there life things like, because it's not just academics, but it's also like you're on your own for the first time and you come from a big family and a close-knit community. So was that weird to be on your own? 

Grace Whitaker:  

I don't know, because I've always been particularly independent. Probably the most independent out of all of my siblings. And so, I was ready to go to college. I remember in fifth grade I was researching UVA.  

Jo Wilbur:  

Oh wow. 

Grace Whitaker:  

Like I was researching stats. I was looking up dorm layouts and seeing which one would be ideal. Like I was ready to go.  

Jo Wilbur:  

You and I are very different... (laughs)  

Grace Whitaker:  

No. Well, I just loved the idea of living on my own, but having everything be walkable, I was really excited for the dining halls that was kind of the one let down.  

Jo Wilbur:  

Man, you, you're doubling down on the dining halls. I hope no one from UVA's listening. 

Grace Whitaker:  

I, no, I, we all know. We all talk about, it's not a secret. Someone once suggested that the company that provided food for our dining halls also provided food for local prisons, but that there had been a lawsuit raised because the food was deemed like unsuitable for the prisons. That was a big rumor going around. I don't know how true it is, but like, if you ate the food, you believe it,  

Jo Wilbur:  

But spread it around. (laughs) 

Grace Whitaker:  

I mean, I believe it. Ooh. It was something else. I was not ready for that.  

Jo Wilbur:  

Okay. UVA's major flaw. There you go, the dining halls. Well, so going into college, were you not nervous at all? Or, or if you were, what were you nervous about? 

Grace Whitaker:  

No, I mean, I feel like I should have been, in hindsight, because there are so many new experiences that I was not like expecting at all. Um, but I was always really excited for college. My senior year, I was cognizant of the fact that it would be my last year at Trinity. And so, I was definitely sad to leave it behind. 

But I was always planning for college. So, I was just excited to, to get started to be on a campus, to do college classes, all that stuff.  

Jo Wilbur:  

So, you went to Trinity for 12 years, pretty much your whole… well definitely your whole academic career. And then going to UVA, what was that transition like from a Christian environment to a secular environment? Uh, was there a little bit of culture shock or how did that go? 

Grace Whitaker:  

There was and there wasn't culture shock. Um, partly because your community is what you make it. Um, and as soon as I got to college, I made it a point to seek out Christian fellowship. 

So, I'm in two Christian organizations now, and most of my close friends are also in those organizations. So, in a lot of ways, my social circles look similar to the way they did at Trinity, because I'm surrounded by like-minded believers. But I'm also interacting day to day with a lot of non-believers, which I never did in my time at Trinity. 

So, sometimes I'll have interactions with someone who's not from the same worldview as me or who had a completely different background. I had someone ask me once when they found out if I went to a Christian school, if they made us pray. And I had never heard it phrased like that. I had to think about that, like, “no, no, they don't make us,” but it was interesting to see how people have totally different ideas of what Christian values are like or what a Christian school experience would be like. 

Jo Wilbur:  

Right. Whereas for you it's, it's like, it's not so much that they made me pray, but they taught me how. 

Grace Whitaker:  

Yeah. Well, and it was always part of my life. And I considered myself blessed to be, to be born into a Christian home and to have the Christian school opportunities that I had at Trinity. Um, but not everyone saw it that way. 

And so, I had to have like a lot of one-on-one conversations to learn more about how other people would be viewing my background. And, and what their background was as well.  

Jo Wilbur:  

Right. so that's interesting having somebody, you know, with a different background, sort of ask you those kinds of questions. Were there other times during your first year that maybe you felt challenged or where you felt like you had to defend your faith? I, I know that's something I think that seniors who are graduating maybe now going into their first year, that they're worried about happening. 

Grace Whitaker:  

Yeah, for sure. I'm, I'm in an academic organization that is, is a secular organization, and the general consensus in that group equates Christianity with ignorance. 

And because the group is academic, they value intelligence highly. We're all there because of our dedication to academia. Um, and so when I say in that group that I am a Christian that really affects their view of me. And that was really hard to grapple with, especially my, my first semester, because I wanted so badly to be seen as intelligent by all these people who are intelligent. 

Um, but the way I dealt with that over the semester was really relationally. I would have one-on-one conversations with people and as they learned more about me and why I believed what I believed, I could almost see their brains working. I mean, I had someone tell me, “You are not as ignorant as I thought you would be.” 

Jo Wilbur:  

Wow.  

Grace Whitaker:  

When, when they heard I was a Christian, um, and that's all relationally and I mean, in general, a lot of the work for the kingdom has to be done relationally.  

Jo Wilbur:  

Sure. Because they can have ideas about what it means to be a Christian, but until they're actually talking to one, sometimes for the first time, some people have never met really a Christian who's really walking with the Lord. It's not until they start having conversations with you and get to know you as a person that they realize, “Oh, this is not a crazy person” or whatever ideas they have in their head. Um, so yeah, you kind of have to not just know what you believe, but live it out, right? And other people see that. 

I think it's easy for Christians to remain in a bubble, right? And just not interact at all with people who are outside of that Christian bubble. But it sounds like you do that. And why is that important and what motivates you to have these conversations and be that light and maybe change their opinion on what Christians are like and what Christianity means? 

Grace Whitaker:  

Yeah, well, it was a bit of a struggle for me at the beginning of the semester. I remember, um, talking to my small group leader and saying that I needed to pray for boldness because of the circles in which I was running, where Christianity was seen as ignorance and, and my pride would get in the way. And I would feel unwilling to, to talk about my faith in fear that people would like me less or respect me less. 

Um, but as I began to have those conversations. And I, I started to realize that people's opinions of me were shifting based on my actions and based on my conversations with them. Um, but in hindsight, it's so… it's so fitting because Christ told his disciples that, that they will be known by their love. 

And that is no less true for us today. Um, Christ’s kingdom is seen through our interactions with other people, because so much of what he did was relational. And so much of what he called the church to, in, in the New Testament was relational. And lots of times people's opinions of Christians can come from bad experiences with the Christian or bad experiences with the church as a whole. 

And that, that is a barrier to, to becoming a believer because if you've had nothing but bad interactions with the church, you're not going to want to know their God. And so I think one of the things that I had to learn was one of the most powerful tools at, at my dispense was, was relationships and interacting with people and showing them the kind of love that I have found in Christ, um, in the hopes that if not now, but one day they would be more open to a relationship with he who first loved us. 

Jo Wilbur:  

Mm, you said that so beautifully. And I love that you talk about people who have been hurt by the church and that it becomes a barrier. I don't know if you've ever read the book “God Space,” but I highly recommend it. It's all about exactly what you're talking about. Um, and about a way to break down those barriers is really as the Christian to start by listening, um, and asking, you know, what…how have you been hurt by the church? If they say that they've been hurt by the church, and really being that listening ear first. And it creates this space where now there's open communication between you and the other person, and you're not coming at them, preaching hellfire and brimstone. But you're listening and… ultimately listening is a relationship, exactly what you’re saying. 

Grace Whitaker:

Yeah, for sure.  

Jo Wilbur:  

So, going into that and going into that environment and those sort of tricky situations... Um, I know I would be intimidated. Did you feel prepared going into that or was it a little bit of a shock and you had to realize, “I’ve got to figure out how to navigate this.” 

Grace Whitaker: 

I actually did feel prepared, which is surprising for me, because I tend to be a worrier. But my senior year apologetics class… I mean, that prepared me more than I possibly could have imagined. I think one week into the school year, I was up late at night having a conversation with, with a young man who used to be Catholic, but left the church. 

Um, and he and I had a long conversation about all different aspects of theology that he had had an issue with. Um, we talked about the problem of evil and, and why a sacrifice like Christ's propitiation for our sins on the cross was necessary. Like we talked through all these issues that he had come across in the faith. Um, and they were all things that just a semester prior, I had been taught how to address.  

Jo Wilbur:  

Wow, how providential. 

Grace Whitaker:  

Nothing, nothing prepared me more for college than apologetics. I think in hindsight, that was the most important class I took in all my time at Trinity.  

Jo Wilbur:  

Mm. And now being in that secular environment, do you feel like overall it has continued to strengthen your faith or make you question things more, or…? 

Grace Whitaker:  

I think absolutely it was strengthening because growing up at Trinity, being at a secular university was the first time my faith had truly been tested. Um, externally and internally as well because I'm having all these new experiences. Um, but I realized through those tests that, that I had been prepared well, and, and I was so unbelievably thankful for that. And it really did make me stronger in my faith in the end, because I could see how well it could withstand all these external and internal challenges.  

Jo Wilbur:  

Yeah. That's powerful. It's powerful to see that for yourself, kind of for the first time. So, you mentioned being involved in several different Christian organizations at UVA, um, which I imagine would be a really good way to remain grounded in your faith. 

Are there other ways that you have been able to remain so grounded and rooted in your faith while there, other than just those organizations? 

Grace Whitaker:  

Finding a home church, um, was one of the first things I wanted to do when I went to Charlottesville because college campus Christian organizations are fantastic, but there's also something to be said about the wider community, a local community of believers. So, I got involved in a local church as soon as I could. Next year, I'm planning on volunteering in their nursery.  

Jo Wilbur:  

Oh, that's great. You're very good with kids.  

Grace Whitaker:  

Thank you. 

Jo Wilbur:  

Um, for those of you who don't know, Grace is our summer camp intern, so she's been working with all of our young campers here and, um, it's been a delight just to see her interact with the kids. 

Grace Whitaker:  

Thank you. Yeah, I do love working with kids. I did it at my home church when I was living here in Fairfax. And so, I'm excited to be able to establish more of those relationships in Charlottesville and continue to make my faith my own, even though I'm not living at home with my parents anymore.  

Jo Wilbur:  

That's great. I know in college, it's really easy to forget about the church piece, just because it's so connected to, “Oh, well I always went to my family church and now I'm not there.” It's really easy to just not go to church, and a lot of people stop going to church unfortunately when they go to college. So, that's huge. Are there any, um, other things, so we've got joining Christian organizations and joining a home church…? 

Grace Whitaker:  

I mean, a lot of the other experiences I had that worked to strengthen my faith all started from the first Christian community that I found. Um, because through there we do a lot of outreach or we do social events with, um, other people on campus, either in other Christian ministries or non-believers on campus. 

And so, by being rooted in a Christian organization so early on, it kind of prepared the path for me to be able to expand, um, outreach and get involved in a lot of other activities and things that ended up being strengthening for me and for the rest of campus as well.  

Jo Wilbur:  

What advice would you give to students who are now going to college for the first time as freshmen? What would be maybe your number one piece of advice or your top three tips if they're listening right now? 

Grace Whitaker:  

I mean, at the risk of sounding redundant, my greatest piece of advice would be to find Christian community. 

I know a lot of people first semester decide to wait on joining new activities until they get a handle for the, like, what the workload is. And I definitely would stand by that with the exception of Christian community, because that's where you're going to find a lot of lifelong friends, a lot of like-minded believers, that's where you're going to have a support system which you'll probably find out you need sooner rather than later. That's just the base of it. That's been the base of it for me. And for a lot of other college students who have come, um, from Christian schools into a secular university, that's the foundation, so, I couldn't recommend that highly enough. 

Jo Wilbur:  

I also want to ask you, do you have advice for not just students who are, um, going into college now, but students who are rising up in their senior year this year? So, this will be their senior year. They're dipping their toe into that college process. Do you have advice for them and going through that process? And for making the most of their senior year here at Trinity? 

Grace Whitaker:  

Yeah. I mean, absolutely. I would say take advantage of what you have while you have it. 

Um, I'm, I'm perfectly happy to be in the university where I am, and I know that God has put me there for a reason, but I also recognize that there are a lot of resources I had, um, at Trinity that I don't have at a university level. And, and so my whole senior year, one of my biggest focuses was trying to soak up every last bit of it. 

I mean, the teachers we have at a small Christian school, it's just an irreplaceable experience because never are there so many teachers in such a small space who are so willing and able to discuss faith to discuss personal lives, who love their students so well. And, and the classes we have, the theology, the apologetics, those are invaluable. 

And I think every student who is here should take full advantage of them so that when they do go out into the rest of the world, especially if it's at a secular university, but even if it's not, so that they're prepared because they will inevitably come up against people who are, who are opposed to the faith. 

And there's no stronger defense than knowing what it is you believe and why. Um, so I mean, just make the most of it. I know for seniors, it's really tricky because we're overwhelmed with APs and, and the oral defense, which is in and of itself a tool that we can use in later years, but they can be really stressful as everything piles on at once. But I think one of the most important things would be just to take a breath and take it all in, be thankful for the blessing that you have in your senior year at Trinity. Um, before it's over.  

Jo Wilbur:  

That’s such a great piece of advice. I did not have the privilege of having a Christian education myself. And I know sometimes I walk into the, um, Christian studies classes here and like the apologetics classes and I get so jealous because it's like, I don't know the answers to these questions. 

I want to… I'm about to ask for that in my contract that I can take some of those classes because um, I can really see how they can be so useful to our real lives as Christians. 

Grace Whitaker:  

Yeah. Well, I mean, they're fantastic. I remember I had a moment my junior year where, I mean, growing up at Trinity, I had a Christian studies class every year. 

And so, I could fall into the trap of being like, “Oh, well this is a test. This is a quiz.” But I had this moment, my junior year, we had a theology class, and we were talking about the Trinity. And I just had this moment where I realized like, this is our God that we get to learn about, like, this is the God of the universe. 

There could never be anything more important to study. Um, and I just felt so overwhelmed with gratitude at the, at the blessing that was this class and this experience, because not everybody gets that. But like, there is nothing more worthy of our time. 

Jo Wilbur:  

Yeah. It impacts your entire life. Thank you so much, grace, for joining us today. We can't thank you enough. I know that your wisdom will bless all those who listen as it has blessed me today. 

Grace Whitaker:  

Thank you so much. 

Outro:  

Thanks for joining us for this episode of mind and heart, a podcast by Trinity Christian school. If you enjoyed this conversation, leave us a five-star review and share this episode with a friend. It helps us so much. For more information, visit us@tcsfairfax.org. 

Thanks for joining us for this episode of “Mind and Heart,” a podcast by Trinity Christian School. For more information, visit us at TCSfairfax.org. 

 

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